Baldur’s Gate 3: Best Astarion Quotes


  • Astarion’s popularity in Baldur’s Gate 3 is due to his sarcastic personality and bad boy attitude.
  • Astarion’s rejection can be hurtful, but also has an unexpected humorous side.
  • Astarion shows growth and development throughout the game, learning to trust and start living again.

Astarion is quite possibly one of the most popular characters in Baldur’s Gate 3, alongside Shadowheart, Karlach, and Gale. So much so that his actor, Neil Newbon, has won two awards so far, as well as a nomination at the BAFTA’s for his incredible portrayal of the lovable vampire rogue.


Baldur’s Gate 3: 10 Facts You May Not Know About Astarion

There’s more than meets the eye with this stunning and sassy half-elf vampire in Baldur’s Gate 3.

The vampire’s popularity might be down to his sarcastic personality and his bad boy attitude, which produce an array of incredible lines. However, Astarion also has a vulnerable side which is primarily seen in his romance storyline, and these vulnerable moments often lead to some very impactful and powerful lines in Baldur’s Gate 3.

10 “Oh Good, Puns. Because Clowns Aren’t Enough Of A Horror Already.”

Astarion Doesn’t Like Clowns

astarion doesn't like clowns

As it turns out, Astarion doesn’t seem too fond of clowns, which is a very common thing. However, Dribbles is a particularly nasty clown, as he secretly is working for the Absolute and is out to kill the player and their companions.

This quote is followed by a series of particularly humorous lines and has elicited many laughs from players and streamers alike. If Astarion is unfortunate enough to be forced to go onto the stage with Dribbles the Clown, he’ll jokingly say that he’ll kill the player while forcing a big smile.

9 “It’s Not You, You Understand, It’s Me. I Have Standards.”

A Hurtful Rejection From Astarion

astarion rejection bg3

Astarion is a popular romance option, but it can be very hard to impress him, and many players who have tried are often rewarded with this sarcastic, but hurtful line. This whole scene starts out as if Astarion is about to proposition the player with a night of passion, only for him to shatter their hopes and deny them by saying that he’d never sleep with the likes of them.

It certainly shows a harsh and unfriendly side to Astarion, and although it’s a hurtful line to hear, it still has its unexpected humorous side. It can be argued that his other rejection is more painful to hear, but this one starts out sympathetic, only to end with a sarcastic and slightly rude attitude, making it a slightly better line. There are, however, many ways to impress Astarion and avoid his unsavory rejection.

8 “I Don’t Know. I’m Sure a Vampire Spawn Could Still Rip Out Your Throat.”

A Little Hostility in the Presence of a Monster Hunter

astarion meets the gur

When the player first meets the Gur, known as Gandrel, in the swamp in Act 1, so long as Astarion is in the party, a particularly dark and hilarious scene will unfold. Gandrel is on the hunt for a very powerful monster, and he’s doing his best to warn the player in case they come across this vicious monster.

It appears that this ‘monster’ is none other than Astarion, and since vampires can’t walk in the sun, the unsuspecting Gandrel ends up revealing all his plans to capture Astarion to the man himself. This line comes about after the player picks the choice that insinuates that a vampire spawn isn’t that dangerous if they’re not a full vampire, to which Astarion will respond with this line in an annoyed tone.

7 “Easy Now Darling. You’ve Got This, And I’ve Got You.”

A Supportive Partner in Times of Need

astarion comforts dark urge

During a Dark Urge playthrough where players are romancing Astarion, some time in Act 2 after his confession scene, and if the player spared Isobel’s life, they will find themselves waking up at night and struggling to fight the urge to kill. The player will soon find that the devious Sceleritas Fel wants them to give in to their urge and kill their lover.


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The romance between Baldur’s Gate 3’s Dark Urge origin and the vampire Astarion is surprisingly heartwarming, humorous, and meaningful.

Luckily, this can be avoided with a successful skill check, and Astarion will restrain and comfort his lover while they resist their deadly urges. While reassuring them, he gives them words of comfort and encouragement, telling them that they’re in this together and that he’s there for them no matter what.

6 “This Is A Gift, You Know. I Won’t Forget It.”

A Very Grateful Astarion


After Astarion accidentally wakes up the player while attempting to drink their blood, he will apologize and tell them that he only wanted a nibble. If the player gives in to Astarion’s pleading gaze and allows him to drink their blood and survive the night, he will walk away, but not before turning back and thanking them for the gift of their blood.

Vampires may seem cold-blooded and evil, but this line shows that Astarion might not be as evil as the rest of them. It also shows a hint to the fact that, during his time as a vampire, he has been treated horribly and has never been allowed to drink blood from a person before. The player is Astarion’s first time drinking the blood of a human, which makes it even more of a gift to him.

5 “All You Had To Do Was Fall For It. And All I Had To Do Was Not Fall For You…”

Astarion Admits His Feelings to the Player

astarion confession

This emotional line from Astarion during his romance confession scene is where he reveals to the player that he had in fact been manipulating them to gain protection from Cazador, his sinister master. It turns out that this entire time he’s been battling with his own feelings towards the player.

The scene is very wholesome and can lead to Astarion and the player hugging after he tells them that he wants to have a real relationship, and that they deserve something real. What makes this line great is that Astarion wants to be honest, and for a charlatan, honesty isn’t exactly in his nature. For the first time in his vampiric life, he finally feels that he can trust someone and let his guard down around them.

4 “You’re Right. I Can be Better Than Him, But I’m Not Above Enjoying This.”

Standing Up to His Tormentor

i can be better than him - astarion in the pale elf quest

At the pinnacle of Astarion’s personal quest ‘The Pale Elf,’ after players confront and defeat his evil master, Cazador, Astarion will be at a crossroad. He must decide whether he should become the vampire ascendant and sacrifice his siblings and all 7000 spawn, or if he should relinquish that power and remain a spawn to save his siblings and the 7000 spawn.

If players convince him to remain a spawn, Astarion will utter this line just before slaughtering his master in a fit of screams and tears as he finally gets revenge after almost 200 years of torment. These words ring true when Astarion saves his fellow spawn and breaks the cycle of abuse that was started by vampires long ago.

3 “…This Group Is Full Of Weirdos!”

A Humorous Hysterical Astarion

this group is full of weirdos - astarion after meeting orin the red

When players first encounter Orin the Red in Act 3, Astarion will hysterically react with a line about being unsure if anyone has been replaced by a shape changer, or if he’s just traveling with a group of weirdos.


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Astarion’s very valid worries over Orin the Red come off more comical than serious and have made many players laugh, as well as becoming a popular quote of many players due to its silliness. Astarion might be more of an antihero than anything, but he still provides some comic relief in worrying situations.


The Iconic Quote Found in a Hidden Scene


What is quite possibly the most iconic quote from Astarion can only occur in a hidden scene during Act 1 in Rosymorn Monastery. This quote can only be heard after completing the ‘Blood of Lathander’ quest, and only if the monastery is destroyed and Astarion dies as a result.

Once Withers resurrects the beloved sarcastic vampire, he will hilariously freak out about having a building dropped on him, as well as chastise the player by saying that next time, he will be the one to aim an all-powerful weapon.

1 “I’ve Been Dead In The Ground For Long Enough. It’s Time To Try Living Again.”

Astarion Fully Embracing Life For the First Time 200 Years

its time to start living again - astarion in act 3

After the culmination of Astarion’s personal quest ‘The Pale Elf,’ and the player is in an established romance with him, he will want to take them to his gravestone. For the first time in almost 200 years, Astarion is finally free and doesn’t have to fear his master anymore.

All Astarion’s quotes in Baldur’s Gate 3 are great, whether they’re sarcastic, humorous, or show his character development, but this one takes the win. It’s an incredible line and shows how far Astarion has developed since players first encountered him on that beach. He’s learned to lower barriers for himself, to trust, to love someone, and he’s learned to start living again.


Antonio Josse

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